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Nerds



So I've been thinking for a couple months now about nerds. No, not the candy that my wife loves and that once broke one of my teeth. I'm talking about people. You know the type of person I'm talking about; guys (almost always) who care more about "nerdy" things than they do about personal hygiene and other peoples' perception of them.

I'm not here to mock them, or put them down, or anything like that. I'm just trying to understand what makes a person a nerd. Is it something you're born with, or is it a result of your environment? Is it the friends you hang out with? certain aptitudes that you possess? Or is it a choice that you made at some point in your life to become a nerd?


I don't know the answers. Heck, I'm having a hard time coming up with the right questions. It's a question that's been perplexing me for some time, and I'll tell you why: I am a closet nerd. At least I think I am. But, in our society, is it what I think I am, or what other people think I am that counts?

Some people know that they're nerds, and are okay with it. Some even sing about it. Some make a lot of money because of it. Has society changed to become more accepting of nerds?

To know if I truly am a nerd as I fear, I've tried to find out what defines a nerd? Here's what I've come up with (from Wikipedia):
  • The stereotypical nerd is intelligent but socially and physically awkward.
  • They typically appear either to lack confidence or to be indifferent or oblivious to the negative perceptions held of them by others.
  • Some nerds show a pronounced interest in subjects which others tend to find dull or complex and difficult to comprehend.
  • On the opposite end of the spectrum, nerds may show an interest in activities that are viewed by their peers as immature for their age.
  • Nerds are often portrayed as unfit and either obese or very thin.
  • Nerds are also sometimes portrayed as having symptoms of obsessive-compulsive disorder, such as by showing an extreme devotion to following rules.

To quote Phil Connors in Groundhog Day, "That's me... Me, me, me... Me also... This is a man, right?"

The qualities are all there, in differing amounts, aren't they? Growing up, I always thought I was headed toward "nerddom", but, either I dodged a bullet, or I'm completely oblivious to the fact that I am, indeed, a nerd.

Despite my nerd-leaning tendencies, I don't consider myself a nerd. Maybe it's because I'm too busy being a normal person to indulge in nerd behavior. Perhaps, between high school (when I truly was a nerd, or at least a nerd in embryo) and when I got married, I worked so hard at not acting like a nerd to be able to attract a mate that I got out of the nerd "habit". Then, by the time I was married and could act like a nerd again, it was too hard to change back.

Maybe if I'd found a mate sooner, I would have found it easier to revert back to my old nerdy ways. Or, if Annie hadn't taken pity on me and overlooked all my faults (including the latent nerdiness) I would be a full-blown nerd today. That seems pretty likely.

So, I guess it comes back to the question from above: Is it what I think I am or what other people think I am that counts? I'd ask for a vote of what other people think I am, but I'm afraid of the results, so I guess that that confirms that it's only what I think that matters (well, and it matters what Annie thinks; but whether she thinks I'm a nerd or not, she's obviously okay with it).

So, since nobody else's opinion matters (except Annie's who has already promised to accept me as I am), my self-assessment is: I'm normal, but only 2 or 3 episodes of Star Trek from becoming a nerd.

8 comments:

Annie said...

I'm pretty confident you DO NOT match wikipedia...thank our Father above!!

a) you are not physically awkward, I know you can't sit on the floor indian style, but I attribute that to the fact you are 6'5"
b) i'm pretty sure you don't lack confidence...you just pretend like you do
c) you're not 'unfit' I think you're hot (and it is MY opinion that counts too)
d) you may be a little OCD...but only in being right ALL THE FREAKING TIME!

I think closed minded would have made the list in a more pronounced way, then I would ahve agreed with it a little more. Good thing your mind is slowly but surely opening up.

I love you:)

Erika W said...

I'm pretty sure there's a little nerd in all of us, Dan. That little nerd voice in our heads and those occational nerdy tendencies keep us humble.

Robert said...

Hmmm, I would say you used to be a nerd. I would agree there. Examples: tiger tail ring a bell?, beads from the glasses, comic books, computer aptitude, space related board games and action figures. But, I think with most nerds they keep doing those things, even when they're older. You've seen em... 30 years old, lame job, playing halo all day. Yes, you definitely were a nerd. Perhaps you should write a book on how to de-nerdify. Last thought. Nerds: It's life, Jim, but not as we know it.

Kristin Sokol said...

So you were definetely a nerd now, not so much. I was like Robert also vividly remember you in high school (you were old enough to know better) wearing a tail. But it was kind of cool in a very nerdy way.

Also I remember the beads that hung from your glasses.

I also remember you spending some time one summer self learning how to write upsidown and backwards.

And then...there was Canalocaust. Okay, so we were all a bit nerdy.

But there was a change, I can't exactly pinpoint when the change occured and you got much less nerdy. We all noticed.

All in all though. I really glad you were the way you were. I wouldn't have changed a thing. I'm also really glad you are the way you are, and I wouldn't change a thing.

Maybe you SHOULD write a book on how to De-nerdify and attract a mate. You are a good writer. You could make a lot of money.

Misty Moncur said...

Annie saved you.

lizzie said...

didn't you once wear a fanny-pack?

Dan said...

It wasn't a "fanny-pack". It was a "Marsupio"... Two very different things. Marsupios are intended to be worn in the front, just like a Kangaroo's pouch (a marsupial). But I can see how they can be mixed up...

katie said...

I can't stop laughing at the marsupio and tiger tail thing. I would LOVE to see a picture of the tail. But let's be honest....nerd or no-nerd, it doesn't even matter. I think your highly intellectual ( more so than most...except me ) and so what if people may think you're a little "savant-ish". It' better than being ugly.